There are so many good blogs out there in the blogosphere. I could spend all my ’spare time’ reading blogs. I’ve gotten to where I prefer that to watching TV or even losing myself in a good book. Instead, I lose myself in reading good blogs.
Some stand out and many (MANY!) are so well written and get so much less attention than they deserve. If talent were the standard by which blogs were rated I strongly suspect there would be blogs we never heard of at the top of whatever rating lists there are.
Which brings me to what I consider one of those blogs that just oozes talent and thought provoking writing.
Donna has a beautiful article about marriage, Serving Goes Both Ways. I have often thought the same things, but haven’t written it so well.
…. serving someone is more an act of love and humility than slavery or obligation.
With so much focus on ‘women’s rights’ we forget that our men also have rights. Somewhere along the line we have forgotten to appreciate them for being men. So many seem to want them to be like women, rather than love them for their manhood. Even worse, when they do act like what we think we want them to act, we dispise them for not being manly. Too often, we devalue their contribution and selfishly refuse to understand their world and their struggles.
It’s really not all about us. The Chinese had it right. The Ying and the Yang are perfect compliments to each other. The ying and the yang come together, join and at the same time maintain their own unique characteristics. This is the proper way of things. The two parts complete the perfect circle.
Well, Donna at Quiet Reverie says it much better than I do.
As a stranger looking at her husband’s eyes as he is looking at her through the camera lense is enough to see that the serving does go both ways.
While you are over there - take a look at her photo album. She has an amazing eye for photogrpahy. Her images tell stories of their own.
January 6th, 2007 at 1:16 pm
I don’t know what to say - but thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words. I think you have articulated yourself beautifully regarding your views on ‘man’ and ‘woman,’ which I agree with, and your talent as a writer is very apparent.
I remember when Laura Schlessinger received so much flack for her book, “The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.” I went out and purchased that book and agreed with every point she made. The reviews on amazon are quite interesting as well…
Take Care, Donna
January 6th, 2007 at 7:37 pm
I am also often amazed at the quality of writing in blogs. But what surprises me more is the following that many poorly written or dull blogs have. There’s something for everyone. I am also stunned by the craft blogs. Amazing folks out there.
BSC: That’s the truth! I’m really amazed at some of the blogs that have rabid fans. I just don’t get the attraction. But like you said, there’s something for everyone!
January 7th, 2007 at 3:05 am
There’s nothing worse than being the sole bread winner and coming home to a miserable wife (or husband for that matter) who just complains that you don’t do enough around the house, that they’re bored, that you don’t do enough specifically for them or worst of all… shows you no respect at all.
That person is busting their butt so you can sit home and watch TV and surf the web while the laundry is in an automatic washer and dryer. The dishes are in an automatic dish washer. You spent a whole half hour of real time preparing food to put in an automatic temperature controlled oven. And spent half an hour using the automatic vacuum cleaner every other day or so (less if you’re sloppy).
Sometimes I wonder about the ones who stay at home and complain like they’re living in the Victorian era taking 3-4 solid days to wash clothes by hand, scrub the floors by hand with caustic chemicals for a full day and taking 5 hours to cook one meal on a coal burning stove every night.
These same people complain that they’ll actually have to spend 5 minutes rubbing their significant others’ shoulders or bitch about taking 1 minute to run and get their clothes ready for them in the morning because they’re running a little late.
We’re a spoiled nation and it shows in the utter contempt many have for the spouse that provides for them. It’s no wonder the divorce rate is so high.
January 7th, 2007 at 3:13 am
Oh and before I get jumped as a male chauvinist pig, I have done the sole bread-winner, the stay at home dad thing and the “both working” thing for years each, so I know what I’m talking about.
And I’m not saying stay at home is not work, but let’s keep things in perspective here… if you are simply refusing to give your guy a back rub because you’re a woman and woman don’t do that kind of thing anymore because you’re “liberated” then you deserve all the misery that is sure to come your way.
January 7th, 2007 at 11:26 pm
Digger makes some interesting points and I applaud the honesty in them as well. However, I was wondering if he meant to be all-inclusive or was he merely singling out housewives?
January 8th, 2007 at 11:58 am
All inclusive.
If you are staying at home, whether you are a man or woman, it shouldn’t matter. I’m just a little fed up with the whole “I’m a woman so I don’t have to care about my man” thing that’s been going around. You’re supposed to be partners, a team. Some women out there seem to think that staying at home is somehow not contributing to a partnership or society in general and that anyone who stays home should be shunned.
It’s utterly ridiculous. All you have to do is look back to World War II to see how much these same women did for the country.
It’s the same for stay at home men, but what’s the old saying… “behind every good man there’s a good woman”… and I believe that term was coined long before this whole “liberated” BS that’s been going around. The same could be said for the stay at home men.
In particular I remember going to a school function for my daughter when I was a stay at home dad (and working mind you! I was bringing in as much as my wife through my online ventures). If you think these women look down at “housewives” you should see what they think of stay at home dads. I was having a conversation with a group and one of the women mentioned that I was stay at home dad. Within minutes I was standing there alone as they all went off and had their own discussions and excluded me.
It’s simply ridiculous all the way around.
January 8th, 2007 at 2:38 pm
Thank you for the clarification - I understand more fully now what you were trying to get across. One of my friends is a stay-at-home dad and he’s fantastic at it!
January 11th, 2007 at 1:23 am
Yeah, and he’s the “scum of the Earth” to most working men and women and a ton of stay at home moms.
Now I’ll give you this, if he’s just sitting around swilling beer, beating the kids and generally being a lazy slob, he is scum of the Earth. But if he’s taking care of the kids, teaching them, spending time with them and also being productive then he should get some credit. But to most in this world he is an unemployed loser…
It’s a fact and double standard that will never go away.